We are beginning Week 4 of Kindergarten today. Thank you Chicago Public Schools -- in the 3 weeks that we've had so far, we've only had 1 full week, and actually, while this is a full week, he has a day off the following week. Looking at the CPS calendar (we are "Regular Track"), Chris & I are continually in amazement how many days he gets off -- he has 6 days off in November!
So far, it's been going okay. I really like his teacher. She's really communicative with parents and seems to be on top of things. The first few weeks have centered around forming letters, both upper and lowercase, as well as beginning to get into their reading and math groups. We've had 2 meltdowns at school where he wasn't able to write his name -- he's fine writing it all uppercase, but has balked at lowercase and we haven't forced him. But, in the first week of school, she wanted them to write their full name (copying it off of their name tag) and he freaked out! The second meltdown was 2 weeks later because he wasn't at his name tag and couldn't spell his last name by memory.
The hardest adjustment for us all is just understanding the routine. Everything is brand new to us and it is hard for me as a mom to not be able to provide any guidance to Ben because I don't know how things work either. For example, Chris is dropping Ben off in the mornings on his way to work, but school doesn't start until 9:15 am and he has to be at work by 9, so he drops him off around 8:45. All of the children (K-8) who get there before school starts are kept in the cafeteria where they are then called out grade by grade to go to their classrooms.
Imagine being a 5 year old in a cafeteria with hundreds of other children where you don't know anyone, don't know what you're supposed to be doing or when you're leaving. Yeah, stressful. Chris left him the first day and called me later and told me that he was glad that I didn't have to do it because I probably couldn't have come away from the experience unscathed. Ben didn't cry, but the kid across the table was. Unfortunately, he ended up getting lost when they called his grade to leave :( The next day, when Chris dropped him off, he was crying and he Chris stayed with him until it was time for him to go to his classroom, which was good because then Chris could understand the process and he could drop him off in the optimal place for Ben to be able to hear when his grade is called.
The amount of homework has been excessive for a Kindergartner, in my opinion. His school is a Classical school, which in this case means that they are working a grade level ahead, and I believe it. He daily has at least 30 minutes of homework, which includes handwriting practice, math, and reading. In addition, he is supposed to be doing 15 mins of reading each day (we don't), and learning his sight words. This makes our after school routine somewhat cramped as we get home around 3:20, get a snack, put the baby down for a nap, do homework until about 4:15 and then have about 30 mins of downtime until I am making dinner, eating, bath and then starting the bedtime routine at 7:15. Part of the problem is that CPS has the shortest day in the country -- his runs from 9:15 - 2:50, which is 5 hours, 35 minutes. The short day, combined with the large number of days they get off make the work they do at home that much more.
There's a big debate on how to extend the day raging in Chicago right now. I'm for a longer day, but I sincerely hope that some of the homework they send home right now would actually be done in class instead of at home. Some days I feel like I'm homeschooling him!
Though honestly, I'm not complaining about it. I'm happy with the way he is progressing and his attitude has been amazing. He is so-so about whether or not he likes school (or so he tells me), but he's making friends and not complaining about having to do his homework, even telling me he'd like to do it. He has definitely been ready for the challenge academically. I want to make sure he gets downtime in and not push him so hard so young. I was talking to my friend whose son is in a good neighborhood school and their homework is currently drawing pictures for about 5 minutes. She makes the good point that how can kids who come from neighborhood schools compete with kids from Gifted/Classical schools when the level of work is so disparate?
I have three opposing forces working within me when I think about all of this. One is upset that I am unable to homeschool my son to spare him of all of the initial anxiety of having to learn new routines and being with him when he doesn't know how to do things like write his name in upper and lowercase letters. However, I know that it would never work for us. I remember asking a homeschooling friend what she does when her son says "No!" when she asks him to do something. She told me that her son very rarely does that and basically does what she asks him to do. This would most certainly NOT be my experience with Ben. He would fight me 80% of the time, particularly when we were working on things that didn't come easily to him (i.e., anything but math).
The other force is the suck-it-up force. Both of my parents worked full-time. I was in daycare from the time I was 2 years old. I went to before school care, after school care, etc. I got teased by older children for being Korean at one of my daycares. I had to learn new routines whenever we switched daycares (which we did after I was getting teased continuously). As a result, I was very independent from a young age. Maybe it's good for him to struggle and figure out things on his own. Still, as a mom, it's hard to watch your kid struggle even if it might be good for him.
The third force is the trust God force, that we are in this school for a purpose and to make the best of it. For the first time, Ben is making friends independent of me and we have an opportunity to be lights for Christ in this school. We told Ben that some people might not know who God is at this school and he said "EVERYONE knows who God is!" and we told him no, that's not necessarily true.
We finally do feel this week that we're starting to get a better handle on things and getting more comfortable with the school and our new routine... just in time for me to start stressing over getting Caroline into Skinner!
Monday, September 26, 2011
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Reflections on 9/11
My memories of 9/11 are different than the vast majority of the rest of the country -- I was in the capital of Zimbabwe, Harare, on a short-term missions trip. Even after 10 years, it's difficult for me to process the events of that time because my trip so radically changed from what it was supposed to be to what it turned into.
On 9/11, we were just getting back to our rooms after spending the day out talking to people. I remember getting a knock on my door from my team leader around 3 pm, telling me that his wife just called and told him that a plane hit the World Trade Center. At the time, we didn't know if it was a small plane, if it was an accident or what. We turned on CNN in our rooms and saw the scope of what had actually happened. As we watched, we saw the 2nd plane hit the other tower. I remember distinctly my team leader saying that he was sure that Osama bin Laden was involved somehow. He was in Kenya when the American Embassy was bombed, so he was versed in the Islamic extremist movement.
My first thoughts were towards my friend Emily who was at school at NYU. She was the only person that I knew was in NYC at the time. Any internet connection was impossibly slow at that point because it was (1) 10 years ago and (2) I was in a developing country. I was able to get off an email to make sure that she was okay and also to my almost-boyfriend (now husband) who worked in downtown Chicago. He said that everything was fine there and that they were sent home early.
The rest of that day was a blur. Our team went out to dinner and the restaurant had the coverage playing over and over. We ate our meal and talked, incredulously, that something like this could have happened. When we heard that all flights had been grounded, we wondered how we were going to get home.
The Zimbabwean people were so gracious to us -- they would ask us if we were Americans and then extend their condolences. Everyone seemed to be in shock over this, not just us.
I finally got a line out to call my mom a few days later. As it turned out, she was actually in New York City for work on 9/11 and had a meeting scheduled for 9 am in a building directly across from the World Trade Center. The meeting got postponed to noon that day, so she was still in her hotel when the planes hit. She described the scene as apocolyptic as everyone evacuated Manhattan covered in soot and ash. She was so upset and was sobbing as she worried about me. I told her "Mom!! I'm in Zimbabwe!! You were in New York City!! I'm WAY safer than you are right now!"
We were scheduled to come home on September 20th and we were still worried about how we were going to get home since all flights in the US continued to be grounded. I was thinking that instead of my Harare -> London -> Chicago route that I might have to fly into Toronto and have my parents pick me up from there and then take the bus or train to Chicago. As it turns out, we were able to leave Harare on time (and boy, was I sweating bullets boarding that plane) and land in London Heathrow. Heathrow was a DISASTER -- since all of the airlines were feeling out the new world post-9/11, they decided that they were no longer going to transfer luggage and were making everyone claim their luggage and then re-check it in! You can imagine what the lines were like. I had to wait in a heated tent (and it was COLD and rainy in London in mid-September) for hours to even get into the airport to check my luggage in! My flight was delayed for hours due to the backlog.
I finally got into Chicago and was so thankful to finally be home and back with my countrymen, but it felt very much like I missed a collective national experience. Even though CNN was available in Zimbabwe, we weren't able to watch it all of the time. We didn't get any of the US network channels and no US print media. In retrospect, I'm glad that I did because the constant rehashing of it is difficult to watch, even 10 years ago, much less 2 or 3 days after. But I do feel like I missed much of the national spirit of unity that many people talk about in the days after.
In the intervening 10 years between then and now, I've gotten married, had 3 children, put my career on hold to raise those children, bought a house, and accumulated many more friends. There are times when I fear for my husband, commuting to downtown Chicago for work every day. But, in reality, the chances of him being the victim of a terror attack is slim to none. I am raising my children in a post-9/11 world, which doesn't mean a lot in our day-to-day lives, but I'm reminded of it when I watch the news or when we fly and all of the hoops that we have to jump through now. Does anyone else remember when we could show our driver's license, put our carry-on bags (with full-sized bottles of shampoo and contact solution!) on the conveyor belt and walk through security with our shoes on? And when we could go to the gate and meet our loved ones as they disembarked?
All of this is so minor compared to what so many people lost on that day -- husbands, fathers, wives, mothers, sisters, brothers. I cannot imagine the horror of knowing that your spouse went to work and then watching those images on tv, always wondering if they were killed instantly or were one of the ones who jumped or were killed when the towers fell. Looking at your young children and realizing that they will grow up without a father. It's heartbreaking.
I'm thankful to all of the first responders out there -- firefighters, police officers, and EMTs. What a difficult job you have. And despite my occasional cynicism and confusion about the US military, I'm thankful for them for protecting our country!
On 9/11, we were just getting back to our rooms after spending the day out talking to people. I remember getting a knock on my door from my team leader around 3 pm, telling me that his wife just called and told him that a plane hit the World Trade Center. At the time, we didn't know if it was a small plane, if it was an accident or what. We turned on CNN in our rooms and saw the scope of what had actually happened. As we watched, we saw the 2nd plane hit the other tower. I remember distinctly my team leader saying that he was sure that Osama bin Laden was involved somehow. He was in Kenya when the American Embassy was bombed, so he was versed in the Islamic extremist movement.
My first thoughts were towards my friend Emily who was at school at NYU. She was the only person that I knew was in NYC at the time. Any internet connection was impossibly slow at that point because it was (1) 10 years ago and (2) I was in a developing country. I was able to get off an email to make sure that she was okay and also to my almost-boyfriend (now husband) who worked in downtown Chicago. He said that everything was fine there and that they were sent home early.
The rest of that day was a blur. Our team went out to dinner and the restaurant had the coverage playing over and over. We ate our meal and talked, incredulously, that something like this could have happened. When we heard that all flights had been grounded, we wondered how we were going to get home.
The Zimbabwean people were so gracious to us -- they would ask us if we were Americans and then extend their condolences. Everyone seemed to be in shock over this, not just us.
I finally got a line out to call my mom a few days later. As it turned out, she was actually in New York City for work on 9/11 and had a meeting scheduled for 9 am in a building directly across from the World Trade Center. The meeting got postponed to noon that day, so she was still in her hotel when the planes hit. She described the scene as apocolyptic as everyone evacuated Manhattan covered in soot and ash. She was so upset and was sobbing as she worried about me. I told her "Mom!! I'm in Zimbabwe!! You were in New York City!! I'm WAY safer than you are right now!"
We were scheduled to come home on September 20th and we were still worried about how we were going to get home since all flights in the US continued to be grounded. I was thinking that instead of my Harare -> London -> Chicago route that I might have to fly into Toronto and have my parents pick me up from there and then take the bus or train to Chicago. As it turns out, we were able to leave Harare on time (and boy, was I sweating bullets boarding that plane) and land in London Heathrow. Heathrow was a DISASTER -- since all of the airlines were feeling out the new world post-9/11, they decided that they were no longer going to transfer luggage and were making everyone claim their luggage and then re-check it in! You can imagine what the lines were like. I had to wait in a heated tent (and it was COLD and rainy in London in mid-September) for hours to even get into the airport to check my luggage in! My flight was delayed for hours due to the backlog.
I finally got into Chicago and was so thankful to finally be home and back with my countrymen, but it felt very much like I missed a collective national experience. Even though CNN was available in Zimbabwe, we weren't able to watch it all of the time. We didn't get any of the US network channels and no US print media. In retrospect, I'm glad that I did because the constant rehashing of it is difficult to watch, even 10 years ago, much less 2 or 3 days after. But I do feel like I missed much of the national spirit of unity that many people talk about in the days after.
In the intervening 10 years between then and now, I've gotten married, had 3 children, put my career on hold to raise those children, bought a house, and accumulated many more friends. There are times when I fear for my husband, commuting to downtown Chicago for work every day. But, in reality, the chances of him being the victim of a terror attack is slim to none. I am raising my children in a post-9/11 world, which doesn't mean a lot in our day-to-day lives, but I'm reminded of it when I watch the news or when we fly and all of the hoops that we have to jump through now. Does anyone else remember when we could show our driver's license, put our carry-on bags (with full-sized bottles of shampoo and contact solution!) on the conveyor belt and walk through security with our shoes on? And when we could go to the gate and meet our loved ones as they disembarked?
All of this is so minor compared to what so many people lost on that day -- husbands, fathers, wives, mothers, sisters, brothers. I cannot imagine the horror of knowing that your spouse went to work and then watching those images on tv, always wondering if they were killed instantly or were one of the ones who jumped or were killed when the towers fell. Looking at your young children and realizing that they will grow up without a father. It's heartbreaking.
I'm thankful to all of the first responders out there -- firefighters, police officers, and EMTs. What a difficult job you have. And despite my occasional cynicism and confusion about the US military, I'm thankful for them for protecting our country!
Sunday, September 4, 2011
'twas the night before the night before Kindergarten
Ben starts Kindergarten in 2 days. He and I are both ready and not ready for this event. Academically, he's definitely ready. Physically, I'm ready for him to go. This has been an exhausting summer for me, having 3 kids at home all day long and not getting much sleep at night. Emotionally, neither of us are ready. He's going into a brand new environment -- we don't know a soul at this school! And that's anxiety-producing for both of us. He's told me a few times that he's nervous about it, which is expected and natural. I'm nervous too! the good thing is that none of the other kids know each other either (or if they do, it's a fluke thing) since kids from all over the city come to this school, so they're all in the same boat and it's not like he's coming into a place with already established friendships.
Of course, I worry about him socially. The thought of my little boy sitting all by himself at the lunch table or wandering on the playground alone is enough to make my sleep-deprived postpartum hormonal self start tearing up. Rationally, I know that he'll be okay. I am praying that he'll find a friend quickly so that going to school will be a little easier for him.
Academically, he'll do fabulously, though I think getting into the routine of doing daily homework will be challenging. He is working 1 grade level ahead at his school and I'm anticipating that the reading will be difficult for him. He's expected to read 40 books by June. 20 of those books we just have to record what he read and the date he read them, but for the other 20 he will have to write a book report (which can be dictated to us).
We had an Open House last Thursday where he got to see his classroom, his teacher, and most of the students. I like his teacher a lot. She's the only teacher in the school who gets the kids outside every day for recess and she really believes in the educating through play. Skinner is a really academic school, so I'm glad that he will have a gradual entry into the rigors of the academia. His teacher is also from Michigan, which makes me like her even more! :)
I personally loved school. I so hope that will be his experience too!
*for a recap of our CPS journey, click here for part 1 and here for part 2.
Of course, I worry about him socially. The thought of my little boy sitting all by himself at the lunch table or wandering on the playground alone is enough to make my sleep-deprived postpartum hormonal self start tearing up. Rationally, I know that he'll be okay. I am praying that he'll find a friend quickly so that going to school will be a little easier for him.
Academically, he'll do fabulously, though I think getting into the routine of doing daily homework will be challenging. He is working 1 grade level ahead at his school and I'm anticipating that the reading will be difficult for him. He's expected to read 40 books by June. 20 of those books we just have to record what he read and the date he read them, but for the other 20 he will have to write a book report (which can be dictated to us).
We had an Open House last Thursday where he got to see his classroom, his teacher, and most of the students. I like his teacher a lot. She's the only teacher in the school who gets the kids outside every day for recess and she really believes in the educating through play. Skinner is a really academic school, so I'm glad that he will have a gradual entry into the rigors of the academia. His teacher is also from Michigan, which makes me like her even more! :)
I personally loved school. I so hope that will be his experience too!
*for a recap of our CPS journey, click here for part 1 and here for part 2.
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